मंथन

सत्य के पीछे का सच

Samay samay ki baat hai..

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on June 2, 2017

हम लोग कमाल के समय में जी रहे हैं.
बचपन में माताजी एक कथा सुनाती थीं: कोई अगर आप से कहे कि कौवा आपकी नाक ले कर उड़ गया, तो पहले अपनी नाक देखनी चाहिए, ना कि कौवे के पीछे भागना शुरू कर दें.. भैया आपकी नाक अपनी जगह पे ही लगी है.

आज के समय में, हम अपने पूर्वाग्रह से इतने ज़्यादा ग्रसित हैं कि हम सिर्फ़ कौवे को पत्थर मारना चाहते हैं. भले वो मेरी नाक ले कर उड़ा है या किसी और की, या फिर वो बेचारा सिर्फ़ घड़े का पानी पीने के लिए पत्थर जुटा रहा है, हमें कोई फ़र्क नहीँ पड़ता. और तो और, यह कौवे और इस एक आदमी की लड़ाई राष्ट्रीय आपदा बन जाती है, तथा ३० ओबी वेन, ४० कैमेरे, और ५० रिपोर्टेर आपको लाइव टेली कास्ट भी दिखाएँगे. फिर, तुलसी बाबा के शब्दों में “जाकी रही भावना जैसी, हरि मूरत तिन देखी तैसी”, संपूर्ण राष्ट्र दो धड़ों मे बँट जाएगा. आधी दुनिया कौवे को बुरा बताएगी बाकी आधी उस आदमी को. और साहब, एक बार हमने राय कायम कर ली, तो कर ली!! अब तो जंग है… पूरे लाव लश्कर के साथ जुट जाएँगे फ़ेसबुक और ट्विटर पे, यह साबित करने को, कि हम कैसे सही हैं. शायद उस से भी ज़्यादा ज़रूरी यह साबित करना होता है कि तुम कैसे ग़लत हो. कैसे कैसे अनर्गल प्रलाप!!

सूचना संचार क्रांति के इस दौर में, जब कि यह अपेक्षित था कि तमाम जानकारियाँ सहज सुलभ उपलब्ध हों, और एक आम इंसान एक सूचित राय कायम कर सके, हम अपने पशुवत प्रवृत्तियों से बाहर नहीं आ पा रहे हैं, यह बहुत अफ़सोस की बात है. दुष्यंत कुमार की पंक्तियाँ याद आती हैं:

कहाँ तो तय था चिरागा हर एक घर के लिए,
यहाँ चिराग मयस्सर नहीं शहर के लिए.

शायद दिनकर जी ने यह कुरुक्षेत्र पहले ही देख लिया था जब उन्होने लिखा था:

सावधान मनुष्य यदि विज्ञान है तलवार .
तो उसे दे छोड़, तजकर मोह स्मृति के पार |
हो चुका है सिद्ध कि तू है शिशु अभी नादान,
फूल काँटों की तुझे कुछ भी नहीं पहचान,
खेल सकता तू नहीं ले हाथ में तलवार ;
काट लेगा अंग तीखी है बड़ी यह धार ||

तो लब्बोलुआब यह है कि ये फ़ेसबुक ट्विटर आदि दोधारी तलवार हैं. आप इनका प्रयोग करके राष्ट्र निर्माण भी कर सकते हैं, और अनर्गल प्रलाप के लिए भी. या फिर आप मेरे जैसे समाधिस्थ भी रह सकते हैं. समाधि का अर्थ है: सम+ आधि. अर्थात आप संतुलन बना कर रख सकते हैं, दोनो तरफ के तर्क सुन सकते हैं, उन पर विचार कर सकते हैं, एक सूचित राय कायम कर सकते हैं, लेकिन किसी की राय बदलना आपके(वो भी बल पूर्वक) कार्यक्रम का हिस्सा नही होना चाहिए.

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We-the-people in Dance-of-Democracy

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on March 29, 2014

Off late there are so many political posts in social media with people supporting for Rahul Gandhi or Arvind Kejriwal or Narendra Modi. But I dont see the debate on what they say about the leader they support… Alas, we only talk about what the other leader didn’t do.
– I will not vote for Modi because Gujarat development was not done by him alone: OK, what about developments done by Rahul Gandhi and Arvind Kejriwal?
– I will not vote for Rahul Gandhi because congress government has scams: OK, does BJP government or third front governments were scam free? Dont you see that even people of AAP are also asking for Money?
– I will not vote for Arvind Kejriwal because he is still holding his government quarter? OK.. do i really need to give counter example on this one? Satyapal Singh for one is still on his house in Mumbai, So is Mira Kumar holding two houses in Delhi… The examples are countless.

I can argue on both sides, but the point i am trying to make is how hollow is our support arguments! We are turning blind eye towards the leader we adore, forget all his shortcomings, and try to poke around even the smallest of the issue in other leader.

But that is not the point for which i am writing this post. This is about an ulterior issue which, either no one looks at, or at least no one wants to ponder upon. The point is simple:

No person or party would do what they have committed or what they are promising right now either in their rallies or election manifesto unless they have complete majority (2/3 seats) or at least simple majority (1/2 seats).

Small parties, when asked to join the govt to complete this number, do blackmail the major party running the government and either the big brother bows down to their demand or resign… Either ways we, the people, loose… And it will keep on happening unless there is a complete majority for one party. You love one political leader, one ideology is one thing… but if that one is not going to get the majority, you’d probably do more harm to him and the country by voting for him than for the one who can provide a stable government. 2009 election cost 2000 Cr on public treasury ( and 4 times more by the candidates and parties), and God only knows how much will be this time, considering inflation and other economic factors, but don’t you think if there are re-elections, it is ultimately we, the people, who’d pay?

If i’d honestly look around, it would be a fantasy and a romantic thought to have a corruption free government. WHY? Because we, the people, are corrupt.. And the leaders do not come from outside universe… they are someone or the other from amongst us… Unless we change ourselves, there will be no end to corruption… But on the other hand, look at China, one of the world famous corrupt government, and yet see the development. I never saw anyone claiming there is no corruption in US or UK. Corruption is everywhere… but their government still delivers..

I see the trend in Indian politics these days… All smaller parties look for 20+ seats.. Thats it!! They know it, that no party is going to get a majority at the centre and each of these 20+ seats will THEN come for a cost!! A berth in cabinet, a blind eye towards what they are doing in their ministry or the parent state.. the leaders be obliged with clean chits from CBI on various corruption cases.. what not!! Hell !! Sometime they could also influence the foreign policy ( Voting against Sri Lanka last year is glaring example of the same) which is supposedly independent of any party at the center!! Remember the FDI in retail proposal of Economists like Manmohan Singh shot down by Communist parties? I dont know if these decisions were correct or not, but the point i am trying to make is: It is a party which has very small number of presence in country and in Lok Sabha, and yet they made the central govt do what they wanted to do. And you know what? We, the people, give them the power to do so!!

Voting for all the regional parties at Lok Sabha election is probably not the best thing in my opinion, and that is what we always do. Vote for them in local body elections, vote for them in State assembly elections, but when it comes to central elections, think of it before you vote. Your vote can really make a change.

We, the people, think we are the juggler in this dance of democracy. But alas, we are played nicely by the leaders who project themselves as monkeys dancing on our command, but in essence, it is exactly the other way round.

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Casticism

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on January 22, 2011

There were very old days, as we read in Vedas, when people were identified and tagged with a caste,based on what profession they were in. Castes were not inherited from father to son… And anyone based on their merits/demerits was identified as brahmin/vaishya/kshatriya/shudra. Then came an era when they started to inherit it from fathers and forefathers.. Principally it was not correct and there were a lot of movements, many enlightened souls, who tried to eradicate this casticism in pre-Independence era. Our government is “strictly against” any such policy. Or at least so I hear. What baffles me is the fact that why they still have almost every government form for any application have this column called religion and caste?? They were suppose to diminish this line of division, isn’t it? How could they eradicate this casticism by associating every Indian to his/her caste and almost identifying everyone by their caste? Some learned souls now even want census based on caste…. God!! what do I do with my politicians….

P.S.: I have been out of it since long… some more pressing things in life made it impossible to continue here. But a few people I listen to, made me come back.

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A party dying slowly…

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on August 25, 2009

While I was growing up and just started to understand governance and politics, it was dawn of Mandal era with V. P. Singh coming up with his great brainstorming idea of reservations for backwards. The images of young people setting fire to themselves been shown on TV are something which are here to stay in my (then too young) memory for years to come. I could not understand the whole idea, and even now I am not too sure if this was a good or bad idea but those images have made me hate such politicians. I personally never hated/discriminated/befriended/envied any other human-being just because of his/her caste or religion. Then came the great idea of Babri mosque in Ayodhya by BJP. Yet again I found countrymen being divided on the basis of religion. As a young mind, I failed to understand why we can’t be just Indian? One sole identity bound by the constitution of India? I hated them as well… Now comes the infamous Narsimha Rao’s congress government with Harshad Mehta’s allegations and JMM bribery scandal.  I hated them as well…

So, when it actually came to the time when I was allowed to vote for the first time in my life, I was to decide between third front, congress and BJP (and few others). It was something like picking the best amongst the worse. I chose BJP!! The sole reason was few things in their agenda which I admired to the core, namely removal of article370 and common civil code for all Indians.

Article 370 because this is THE reason why Kashmir was not progressing. That was the time of heightened terrorist attacks in Kashmir valley. Young kashmiri boys were lured to become terrorists! Because they don’t have anything else to do! Because there is no economy or industrial progress in the valley! Because this article hinders any outsider to come and setup industry in Kashmir! Why do we discriminate people of Kashmir with anyone residing elsewhere in Indian Territory? This article was a follow-up of UN resolution to maintain status-quo so as to take a mandate in Kashmir, the resolution which we ourselves have discarded in 1971 Shimla agreement!! I couldn’t comprehend why do we need to maintain this article and let people of the valley suffer? Same goes for common civil code. We all are Indians first and then anything else. Though we are free to follow whichever religion we want to, we should at least have common civil laws. Variable laws for same actions based on ones religion was something again beyond me. Though they had few things in their agenda I didn’t like but yes I was ready to give a chance to someone new to bring fresh ideas into the system. The party was led by Atal Bihari Vajpayee; one of the most admired politicians and was full of intellectuals which were not blood related to each other or not the sons/daughters of senior leaders. And the infamous confidence-vote lost by BJP because Giridhar Gomago was allowed to vote despite being CM of Orissa again made me feel that BJP led government was taken down by manipulation. That too when this government made India proud by Pokharan-II without bowing against all the economic sanctions imposed by UN and other countries.

That was the BJP I loved!! That was the party I admired!! The party which was democratic, who thought about the nation first! Today’s BJP is nowhere near to what it was those days. The downfall I guess had started after Vajpayee left BJP and active politics. His leaving party created a vacuum which Advani tried to fill in but failed terribly. And the last loksabha elections were the last nail in the coffin. Even sitting in the opposition for last five years, they had never looked towards the benchmarks set by Atalji who, while in opposition, praised whole-heartedly Indira Gandhi and called her as “Durga” when she went on with nuclear tests. All Advani did was opposing to everything which government is doing including nuclear deal with US. They might be correct but they had never been able to present their stand in front of common man who was still facing the rise in inflation and still waiting for basic amenities to be given to him. The split between Arun Jaitley and Sudhanshu Mittal during the election had all the desired results. The party is slowly and gradually becoming the next congress party. Expelling Jaswant Singh in first 30 minutes of “Chintan baithak” without giving him a chance to clarify his stand, while Advani doing almost similar thing was spared, shows the kind of democracy is prevailing inside the BJP. Senior leaders like Arun Shourie and Yashvant Sinha writing to president of setting responsibilities to the person(s) responsible for such defeat fell into deaf ears. Lobbying and marksmanship is at peak, and the common-civil-code that BJP had promised for whole India does not exist in party itself. probably Aurn Shourie would be the next one to be shown the way out and Sudhindra Kulkarni has already resigned because of ideological differences with the party.

Its tragic to see the party dying in such a way which I once considered as the future of Indian politics.

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what is between mulayam and reservation: they are “just friends”

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on June 10, 2009

The flag-bearer of reservation in school/collage/govt. jobs/private jobs and where not for ST/SC/OBC/muslims and who else not, our own mr. mulayam singh yadav has now some problems with the woman reservation bill… Reason? Now he thinks that if this reservation is implemented, people (his exact words were “Leaders like Murli Manohar Joshi, Sharad Yadav, Basudeb Acharya have reached this stage not in one day but through hard struggles” ) who have worked hard all their life will be deprived of what they deserved… wonderful, isn’t it?

So now we have two categories of what one deserves after their hard work:
1) Students from upper caste (incidentally who have no hand whatsoever in deciding which caste of family they would like to be born in), who slog, study hard, and yet denied admission in good collages due to reservation. Professionals who work hard to get a position in an organization but are again denied because the seats are reserved.
2) The most elite class of India, the political leaders: Who work hard to earn (perhaps snatch would be the correct word) every single penny which would have been used in public welfare and development. Now that the Indian politics has largely been dominated by male, and those set of people have created their own place in this system, are now afraid of their horizon being shortened because now 33% of them will not be given an opportunity for “hard-work” which they’d been doing till now.

Remember, this was the same Mulayam singh yadav, who had implemented the decision of providing seats to reserved candidates in medical/engineering collage even if they’ve got 0 (zero) marks in entrance exam.

And I was thinking that only I am insane.

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Alarming situation in Pakistan

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on April 24, 2009

With every passing day the situation of pakistan is increasingly making me more afraid of its consequences. The latest thing being Buner held by Talibans and their counter-assault on forces sent to save people there. And the worst part is the policitians there are still clueless about what to do next. The more I read in news and internet about the situation (and I read quite a lot, from different and diverse sources, to have unbiased assessment), I now tend to believe even the people of pakistan have gone in denial mode which is not good. They still think that its India which is behind this… I mean grow up people! They are merely 100 Kms from your national capital. And you are still cribbing over the drone-attacks on afghan border and Indian presence in Afghanistan? I know its a mutual tendency of both country’s nationals to blame everything on each others country, but accepting sharia law in swat, cease-fire with talibans, dont tell me Indian “RAW” has infiltrated pakistan government to such an extent to have whatever executive decisions be made for themselves. I am scared because the day Pakistan goes down to talibans, India would be first recipient of the attacks by those fanatics.

Indian government is not a bit less either. They are sending NSA to Sri Lanka where LTTE is fighting lost battle.

In the meantime Indian people are enjoying IPL as well as elections. I cant enjoy either.

I hope and pray to God that sense will prevail before its too late.

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Men Are from Mars, Women Are From Venus

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on April 13, 2009

Most of the IT fraternity has already read following in some point or the other… This is for those non-IT people who have better things to do than forwarding jokes: But this is my all-time-favorite story:

Here’s a prime example of “Men Are from Mars, Women Are From Venus” offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix:

The professor told his class one day: “Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story. The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As homework tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that paragraph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another paragraph to the story and send it back, also sending another copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be absolutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and anything you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a conclusion has been reached.”

The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary.

——————————————-

THE STORY:

(first paragraph by Rebecca)

At first, Laurie couldn’t decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the question.

(second paragraph by Gary)

Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. ” A.S. Harris to Geostation 17,” he said into his transgalactic communicator. “Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far…” But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship’s cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the cockpit.

(Rebecca)

He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4. “Congress Passes Law Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel,” Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news simultaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and carefree, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. “Why must one lose one’s innocence to become a woman?” she pondered wistfully.

(Gary)

Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live.
Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu’udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dim-witted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu’udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie.

(Rebecca)

This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic semi-literate adolescent.

(Gary)

Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. “Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F–KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I’m such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!”

(Rebecca)

Asshole.

(Gary)

Bitch

(Rebecca)

F__K YOU – YOU NEANDERTHAL!

(Gary)

Go drink some tea – whore.

(TEACHER)

*A+ – I really liked this one.*

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Relationships described…

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on March 6, 2009

Its been long since I visited this place of mine… and now that I am back, its not something original. I got this forwarded mail and I just read the whole thing nodding and smiling. I would like to give due credit to whoever wrote this but alas!! as all fwded mails, I dont know its origin. Nevertheless, a good write-up and a wonderful food of thought!! Read on…..

Importance of having the right person in your life!

1.Do you wake up every morning and wish you had more time to sleep?
2.Do you eat your breakfast and complain about how bad it is ?
3.Do you go to the office, find a quiet place to sleep or watch a movie/soap ( a movie that u have seen a hundred times)?
4.Do you go for long walks with your friend at 10 AM in the morning?
5.Do you think you boss is a nut case and deserves to sent to hell?
6.Do you think that they pay you less even though you have not worked your ass off in ages?
7.Do you think that this world is a boring place and everything around you sucks ?
8.Do you fight with ur spouse for no reason and blame her/him for all your faults?
9.Have you lost the drive to do anything new in life?
10. Do you find sex a boring and tiresome chore?

If you have answered yes for more than 5 of the above questions, you are in serious trouble!. You are damaging your mental and physical health every minute and will probably live a discontent life. Scared? you should be…you have every goddamn reason to feel scared.

I’ve always believed that there are two things in life, one of which, you have to get right! Else you are in deep trouble. One is finding the right guy/girl to spend the rest of your life with and the other is finding a job that you love. Here is why!

Let’s say you get the ‘right girl’, which is harder than finding a needle in haystack, you are bound to be happy for most of the time of your life despite its ups and downs. She will be patient with your failures, take care of you when you are sick, love you for what you are ..blah blah and all that crap about true love which I hate to write about but does exist between a few people in this planet.

Let’s say you find the job you love, which is the hardest thing in the world unless you know who you are. You will not regret spending time at work. You will find the word ‘recreation’ meaningless. Your work will keep you happy enough to forget the world around you. You will love yourself and in turn find it easy to love everyone around you despite their faults.

Lets dig relationships a little deeper first and see why we often tend to make a mistake.

Relationship:

Most of us end up with the wrong person no matter what we try to do or how much we analyse before taking the plunge. You always hear that relationships are delicate, they are complicated and that you need to work on them. You have to be crazy to believe all that. Tell me this, did you ever have to even try to work on your relationship with your parents, with your best friends? Did you ever contemplate of breaking up with them? These are the relationships that stay solid for life and the ones that will keep you happy forever. if you find someone who makes you feel like he/she is your family, you probably have hit the right note. However, this does not happen for most of us. Here is why,

Guy picking the wrong girl:

All of us are afflicted by various syndromes. Let me talk about the most common ones.

The pretty face syndrome:

You always had a crush on an actress who played the savitri in Indian cinema. You cannot resist her fresh morning looks, her pretty smile, her classic walking style not to mention the sweetness with which she speaks to others, the way she blushes and the way she enjoys the rain and gets drenched Ignorant of the terms sinus and pneumonia.

Guys like you will fall for every single girl that fits this mould. You will not want this girl to be your girlfriend but you will want her to be your wife!. Remember Gunther of Friends, you are that one…You will fall in love hundred times with hundred people and claim every single shitty experience to be true love. You will eventually find a girl and fall in what you will call ‘true love’. You will be so hen pecked that you will start forgetting that she is just another person. You will worship her unworthiness, profess your love every single minute, tell her that you will keep her happy till the end and do things that you have never done for your mom and dad.

All this till the fake love wanes off….then starts the real hell for both of you J

You will feel insecure every time she dresses up hot and everytime wannabe dudes hang around her and flirt with her. You will try your best to hide your jealousy but will not be able to contain and do more harm to yourself… I have seen some psychoes cut themselves up and bleed bcos his girlfriend happens to have a good looking friend whom she enjoyed talking to.

Phew, it tires me to even think of junta like you. Grow up!

The HOT syndrome:

This is the more dangerous one.

You are between 20 and 30, you have cash to burn. You have a fancy car whose speedometer has never touched 100.

You buy designer stuff and really tight fitting clothes that accentuate your six folds ( analogous to the six pack!).

you fancy every single hot babe in the planet cos u think u have it all! You hang out in the discs with your pretty girls whom you’ve never had the courage to ask out. You shell out thousands of bucks at ease cos it makes u look cool. In reality, you are struggling to pay your EMI for the umpteen things u bought out of insecurity and desperation.

You go to the gym religiously, sit on the bench press/smith and talk on the phone with the long list of girlfriends you claim to have.

You have a wallpaper of the latest bolly/holly babe and even consider it cool J

You have a fake attitude and have forgotten that things like courtesy and humility do exist. In reality, you have even kissed a girl even though you will be thirty in a few days. This can be also be termed as Ihaventgotlaidyet syndrome.

You ask a girl out of your league for a romantic dinner date and when she refuses , you bite her in the back and call her a bitch. You even claim to your wannabe group of friends that you totally nailed this one.

Don’t worry, you are not alone. The young IT brigade of india has loads of heartthrobs like you J. You will turn out to be the one who has an attitude problem everywhere with everyone. You will not have the heart to respect others for what they are. You will lose judgement because of your insecurity and jealousy. When you reach your thirties, you will have your mid life crisis and make your life totally miserable.

The AWESOME dude:

Before I move to the girls, I have to tell you that there are a great bunch of guys out there. Most of them are never single after 25. They are taken a lot early in their life.

A guy of this type works hard at everything. He goes to the gym to stay fit and not flaunt his biceps. You will find him work like crazy when he is working, party like hell when he is with his best buddies. He drinks cos it is fun to get drunk with his buddies and fool around and not to fill the emptiness in his life. He has his own ideals and will stick to them no matter what. He will not cheat anyone. He has a passion for something and feels totally incomplete when he cannot pursue it.

The problem with this one is that he is not the smooth talker. He has a very select group of friends and will consider them family. He does not care a damn about what it takes to please a girl. He is too occupied with stuff he cares about like F1, cricket, music . However, once in a relationship, he will adapt and keep you happy. Do not expect him to be your servant and be at your call. He takes time to grow up and stop being a little self centric. Forcing things on him will turn him really violent and crazy J

If you have a boyfriend/hubby of this type, give him the freedom and he will come back to you. Don’t lose him, you will never be able to fill the void he leaves

Girls :

I know that every single girl who reads this will call me a male chauvinist pig J

Babes, this piece is dedicated to the mystery that you are… there are so many types of you, its hard to narrow down to a smaller set. God must have got it terribly wrong when he experimented with you. try identifying yourself with the below,

I am so cute syndrome:

You have an pretty face and that is where it ends…you are pampered by your parents and the above list of useless dudes who hang around with you for no reason. You have a crush on every single good looking guy you meet in the planet but will not show it out. You like pink! Anything that is pink! You will probably wear a pink sindoor if that was allowed. What the hell is all that about? You dream of a guy who is well read, a MBA grad probably, has a great big house, has a mom who will adore u and all that thing abt the perfect life. But you totally fail to realize that its not gonna happen in reality and when you marry the guy who you settle for, you make his life miserable. The guy you marry is never your first choice and he undergoes hell every single minute of his life from the moment he met you. you will turn out to be the nagging wife that men are scared of!

I am the hot one syndrome :

You are hot… atleast u think so… and you are totally crazy! you wear fancy designer stuff that does not fit you and does not make you feel good. You do it bcos the guys look at you..in reality, they are wondering where the hell this one landed from. You will be fat but that does not stop you from wearing a levis lycra that hugs you tight like second skin. You will wear make up even when you sleep! You claim to have the best taste of everything and can talk about designer brands you never. You have never worked hard in your life and have always complained about every single thing in your life. You hook up with a desperate guy who has no other intention that to ‘you know what’ and use his desperation to satisfy every single materialistic need of yours. While doing so, you make sure you give him regular doses of your fake love to secure the leash around his neck. When it comes to marriage, you will dump him and look out for a better prospect..you will probably look for someone who looks smart, earns hell a lot of money and is totally devoted to you from day one. You will expect him to keep smiling even though you are rude to him all the time. Even if you manage to get a guy of this sort, you will not be content..you will look out for your next catch. You are a maniac despite your hotness.

Barney puts it so right..

The problem is certain women’s increase in physical attractiveness has been disproportional to their increase in psychosis. Luckily for us, a chart exists where we can see just how out of balance the ratio between your hotness and craziness has become – knowledge that can prove to be invaluable over the course of your daily life. The girl needs to be on the right side of the diagonal. If you cannot figure out which side it is , you are probably crazy already.

You might probably end up as one of those cougars who can be manipulated easily by anyone who has the bling and is ready for a fling!

These are two major useless type of women I have seen. There are many other specimens whom I don’t even want to right about. Its so hard to think abt them and not bleed my brains out!

The AWESOME babe:

But there is a select group of girls, who are so down to earth despite their hotness. A girl of this kind does not realize that she is irresistible. her smile will assure you that all is well with the world. She does worry about her looks, but is not obsessed with the mirror and lipstick. She reads quite a lot and probably knows more stuff than you do. She did not grow up like a princess and got everything the hard way. She knows what she wants and how to get there. She does not want to settle for a guy who seems to have it all but will fall in love with the one who loves her for what she is. She will ask for your help but will not demand you to be at her service all the time.

These are the ones that will love you unconditionally even if you don’t deserve it. if you have a girl of this type, dude, keep her happy..she deserves every single bit of it. Buy her flowers, take her out when she expects it the least, gift her a teddy, sing to her as long as it doesn’t kill her J …this one deserves to be swept off her feet every single day of her life. Life is not just good with her, its ‘awesome’

Now that you have learnt about the types of junta , here is my take on what you should do with your relationship

Guys,

If you are single,

I know its hard to be single..it is very hard when everyone around you seems to have a girlfriend or claims to be in love. The truth is that most of them are miserable. They have everything other than love for each other. Look closer, you will be able to see the cracks in their life. Most of them did the mistake you are about to make. They fell in ‘love’ because they did not want to end up single. Wait for your turn. Believe in destiny. Keep your mind fresh for the ultimate one. You will find her. Do not have any expectations and carry on with your life. Love will find you.

If you are in a relationship,

Phew, I know its complicated! Isn’t it? Every single day brings something you never expected. It can be good or bad. Generally its confusing

Most of the relationships are born out of insecurity and lack of self love. They are fragile and need to be taken care of. Ever heard of this crap about ‘managing a relationship’. It hurts me when I see talk shows on how to keep your husband happy and websites on what one needs to do to stay put in a relationship. You don’t ‘handle’ a relationship. You just let it be what it is. If you are having to change yourself or put extra effort to make the other one happy, you are losing it. You will never be happy.

The mistake we often do in a relationship is to expect way too much from the other person and try to change them. We hardly accept anyone for what they are. we get upset when the expectations are not met.

We often blame our partners for our failures and end up being rude to them for no reason.

Guys generally are more insecure than the girls and show it out in weird forms. You will often find guys being male chauvinistic and controlling for no reason. A guy who is sure about himself will have all the love to give and will generally not pick a wrong partner unless he was duped by a hot one ( guys have a great weakness for hot babes). One thing about guys is that when they fall in love, they will do anything to keep the girl happy and will not worry about whether she is good looking/hot/rich/well read. We just don’t have a set of criteria that a girl needs to satisfy. We are just in search of the ultimate ‘one’

Girls generally don’t fall for looks much. But they do fall for convenience. It is so convenient to get married to a guy who has it all. Its not surprising that most matrimonial sites are filled with women looking for a well settled, well educated NRI. Take a look at the list of criterion put up by guys, you will hardly find anything materialistic (you might find some weird stuff like homely looks and all that). When a girl does not get the guy she wants and settles for a lesser one, hell breaks loose. She will not stop complaining. She will have problems if he spends too much or too less time with her. She will not like him if he comes home early and will whine like a dog when he comes home late after a hard day’s work. She will always tend to compare him someone more successful and rue openly the fact that she ended up with a lesser one.

My only advise to junta in relationships is to accept what the other person is and love them for what they are. its hard..very hard but that is the right thing to do. If not, there is nothing wrong to break up with the person. Its better to be happily single than to be miserable. Also, fall in love with yourself…you will stop expecting too much from the other person and will be content even if the other person is not the right one. Life is too small to live in misery. When you make a decision abt anything, do not think in short term. Think in long term. Think with your heart and not your mind. When you grow old and look back, you should not be looking at a long list of regrets and failures but a list of fond/loving memories. As they say, when you grow old, it is the memories that count. Not the hot one u dated, the swanky house you lived in or what the world around thinks about you

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Emergence of new Indian voter

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on January 8, 2009

Shibu Soren, the CM of Jharkhand has lost the by-election in Tamar assembly seat.

For all, who have a short-term-memory-loss problem, it all started with famous nuclear deal, and the then chief minister Madhu Koda has to give way to Soren as CM (a deal mediated by our very own Lalu Yadav) in lieu of 5 “precious” votes for the nuclear deal in parliament. He has taken the office on 27 august 2008 and since he was not the member of house, he was supposed to get elected as a member within 6 months. So technically he still has a good 2 months left before he will be forced out of CM’s office, being a running CM and then loosing an assembly election (keeping in mind, its India) and when whole government functionary would be forced to work out the favorable result, shows the new face of Indian voter!!

Kudos people!!

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Jana Gana Mana…

Posted by Sudeep Pandey on December 14, 2008

I usually go to watch movie every friday… A bachaler like me has nothing much to do during weekends. One thing I loved and really look forward to, while I go watch movie in a theatre in this part of India. I am not sure of it whether it happens in other parts of India because I seldom went to movie in other parts of India. And that thing is they play “Jana Gana Mana” before the start of the movie. Everytime when I listen to him (this is deliberate: its not listen to “it”, its listen to “him”), I have a uncontrollable urge to sing along with the singers. This whole thing reminds me of morning prayer assembely in school days and the yell of “Jaaaai Hind!!” after national anthem is complete. Yet I cant do it. But some people does… I have heard them singing along…

Guys, We are talking about our national anthem, and like anything national, we have some rules associated.
For the benifit of you and all my fellow Indians, I am listing down them here (I mysef have learnt fifth point while I searched for the rules in yahoo answers):

[RULES]
1. Always be in attention position during the National Anthem.
2. In some countries people use to keep their right hand fist on the heart while National anthem; this is not allowed for Indian National Anthem.
3. National anthem if started then should be completed in anyways.
4. National anthem could not be sung under roof. National anthem should always be sung in open area under the sky.
5. Never use (it) for National Anthem while writing about National Anthem. He’s Live.

This is the fourth point which we should take care of while national anthem is being sung inside theatre… you cannot sing along because you are standing under a roof, its only required to be in attention position. Please do not move, stand-up if sitting, and feel the warmth and glory associated. Following rules is just another way of showing respect towards your country.

Jai Hind!

Posted in India, me, nation | Tagged: , , , , | 16 Comments »